Item: Chemical Analysis
Subject: Women
Symbol: Wo

  
  
  
 Discovered by:  Adam
  
 Atomic Weight:  Average expected as 118lb, but there are known isotopes ranging from 100lb to 160lb.
  
 Occurrance:     Surplus quantities in all urban areas.
  
 Chemical properties:
         a) Posses great affinity for Gold (Au), Silver (Ag), 
            Platinum (Pt), precious and semi-precious stones 
            and minerals.
         b) Capable of absorbing great quantities of expensive
            substances.
         c) May explode spontaneuosly if left alone with male.
         d) Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly increased
            with saturation in ethanol (alcohol).
         e) Yeilds to pressure if applied in the correct maner.
  
 Physical properties:
         a) Surface usually covered in painted film.
         b) Boils at nothing and freezes without reason.
         c) Melts if given proper treatment.
         d) Bitter if used incorrectly.
         e) Found in various states in nature, ranging from 
            virgin metal to common ore.
  
 Uses:   a) Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.
         b) Most powerful reducing agent of money known.
         c) Can aid in relaxation.
  
 Tests:  a) Pure specimens turn rosey tint if discovered
            in natural state.
         b) Turns bright green if placed beside better specimen.
  
 Caution!!!:
         a) Highly dangerous in inexperienced hands
         b) Illegal to posess more than one permanent specimen.