The Unofficial Smilie Dictionary

:-)   Your basic smilie. This smilie is used to inflect a sarcastic or
      joking statement since we can't hear voice inflection over Unix.
;-)   Winky smilie. User just made a flirtatious and/or sarcastic remark.
      More of a "don't hit me for what I just said" smilie.
:-(   Frowning smilie. User did not like that last statement or is upset
      or depressed about something.
:-I   Indifferent smilie. Better than a Frowning smilie but not quite as 
      good as a happy smilie
:->   User just made a really biting sarcastic remark. Worse than a :-).
>:->  User just made a really devilish remark.
>;->  Winky and devil combined. A very lewd remark was just made.

Those are the basic ones...Here are some somewhat less common ones:

(-:   User is left handed
%-)   User has been staring at a green screen for 15 hours straight
:*)   User is drunk
[:]   User is a robot
8-)   User is wearing sunglasses
B:-)  Sunglasses on head
::-)  User wears normal glasses
B-)   User wears horn-rimmed glasses
8:-)  User is a little girl
:-)-8 User is a Big girl
:-{)  User has a mustache
:-{}  User wears lipstick
{:-)  User wears a toupee
}:-(  Toupee in an updraft
:-[   User is a Vampire
:-E   Bucktoothed vampire
:-F   Bucktoothed vampire with one tooth missing
:-7   User juust made a wry statement
:-*   User just ate something sour
:-)~  User drools
:-~)  User has a cold
:'-(  User is crying
:'-)  User is so happy, s/he is crying
:-@   User is screaming
:-#   User wears braces
:^)   User has a broken nose
:v)   User has a broken nose, but it's the other way
:_)   User's nose is sliding off of his face
:<) user is from an ivy league school :-& user is tongue tied.=":-)" user is a hosehead :-) user is a punk rocker :-( (real punk rockers don't smile) :=")" user has two noses +-:-) user is the pope or holds some other religious office `:-) user shaved one of his eyebrows off this morning ,:-) same thing...other side |-i user is asleep |-o user is yawning/snoring :-q user is a smoker :-? user smokes a pipe o-) megaton man on patrol! (or else, user is a scuba diver) o :-) user is an angel (at heart, at least) :-p nyahhhh! :-s user just made an incoherent statement :-d user is laughing (at you!) :-x user's lips are sealed :-c user is really bummed <|-) user is chinese <|-( user is chinese and doesn't like these kind of jokes :-/ user is skeptical c=":-)" user is a chef @="User" is pro-nuclear war *<:-) user is wearing a santa claus hat :-o uh oh! (8-o it's mr. bill! *:o) and bozo the clown! 3:] pet smilie 3:[ mean pet smilie d8="Your" pet beaver is wearing goggles and a hard hat. e-:-) user is a ham radio operator :-9 user is licking his/her lips %-6 user is braindead [:-) user is wearing a walkman (:i user is an egghead <:-i user is a dunce k:p user is a little kid with a propeller beenie @:-) user is wearing a turban :-0 no yelling! (quiet lab) :-: mutant smilie the invisible smilie .-) user only has one eye ,-) ditto...but he's winking x-( user just died 8 :-) user is a wizard c="}">;*{))  Mega-Smilie... A drunk, devilish chef with a toupee in an updraft,
			  a mustache, and a double chin

Note: A lot of these can be typed without noses to make midget smilies.

:)  Midget smilie
:]  Gleep...a friendly midget smilie who will gladly be your friend
=)  Variation on a theme...
:} - What should we call these? (what?)
:) - Happy
:> - what?
:@ - what?
:D - Laughter
:I - Hmmm...
:( - Sad
:[ - Real Downer
:<- what? :{ what? :o yelling :c what? :q what? :,( crying [] hugs and :* kisses |i asleep |^o snoring :-` smiley spitting out its chewing tobacco :-1 smiley bland face :-! " :-@ smiley face screaming :-#| smiley face with bushy mustache :-$ smiley face with it's mouth wired shut :-% smiley banker :-6 smiley after eating something sour :^) smiley with pointy nose (righty) :-7 smiley after a wry statement 8-) smiley swimmer :-* smiley after eating something bitter :-& smiley which is tongue-tied :-0 smiley orator smiley invisible man (:-( unsmiley frowning (:-) smiley big-face ):-) " ):-( unsmiley big-face )8-) scuba smiley big-face=":-)" smiley punk-rocker=":-(" (real punk rockers don't smile) +:-) smiley priest :-q smiley trying to touch its tongue to its nose :-e disappointed smiley :-t cross smiley :-i semi-smiley :-o smiley singing national anthem :-p smiley sticking its tongue out (at you!) :-[ un-smiley blockhead :-] smiley blockhead :-{ smiley variation on a theme :-} ditto {:-) smiley with its hair parted in the middle }:-) above in an updraft :-a lefty smilely touching tongue to nose :-s smiley after a bizarre comment :-d lefty smiley razzing you g-) smiley with ponce-nez glasses :-j left smiling smilely :-k beats me, looks like something, tho. :-l y. a. s. :-: mutant smiley :-\ undecided smiley :-| "have an ordinary day" smiley ;-) winking smiley :-< real sad smiley :->   y.a.s.
  :-z   y.a.c.s.
  :-x   "my lips are sealed" smiley
  :-c   bummed out smiley
  :-v   talking head smiley
  :v)   left-pointing nose smiley
  :-b   left-pointing tongue smiley
  :-/   lefty undecided smiley
  :-?   smilely smoking a pipe
  .-]   one-eyed smilely
  ,-}   wry and winking
  0-)   smiley cyclops (scuba diver?)
  :-=)  older smiley with mustache
  :u)   smiley with funny-looking left nose
  :n)   smiley with funny-looking right nose
  :    midget smiley
  }:^#})  mega-smiley:  updrafted bushy-mustached pointy nosed smiley with
			a double-chin
:-)     ha ha                   ~~:-(   net.flame
|-)     hee hee                 O |-)   net.religion
|-D     ho ho
:->     hey hey                 8 :-I   net.unix-wizards
:-(     boo hoo                   X-(   net.suicide
:-I     hmm                     E-:-I   net.ham-radio
:-O     uh oh                    >:-I   net.startrek
:-P     nyah nyah                3:o[   net.pets
|-P     yuk

:-}     beard
:-{     mustache
:-#     braces
:-X     bow tie
:-Q     smoker
<:i dunce (:i egghead @:i turban 8-) glasses b-) horn-rims 8:-) glasses on forehead :-8( condescending stare ;-) wink>:--
Birth   |-O     Death 8-#
Infinity        8